My Heart CH.10

content warning: this chapter slightly contains sexual related topics

My Heart: A Joshayley Story
CHAPTER 10

HAYLEY'S POV:
School finally ended. I needed an answer from Josh before I am even caught dead at that party. I would definitely not go alone. Jaelyn seems very nice right now. It's a shame Josh won't give her a chance, but first off I need to find out what he was hiding from me. Could it be that bad?

I approached him steadily when we got out of school. We were supposed to walk together, as always. "Okay, Josh. Confess," I said too quickly. I hoped he didn't feel pressured in any way.
"We need to get out of here first. Starbucks, Hayles?"

Oh my God. He called me Hayles...where did that come from?

"Hayles?" I asked, probably wide eyed. "Yeah. Don't you like nicknames?" he replied. "Y-yeah, sure." I agreed. Of course I liked it. I had a nickname. From him. "So anyways, stop changing the subject. Are you nervous to tell me? Is it...embarrassing? Scary? Sad? Does it hurt to..."
He cut me off and pressed a finger to my lips. "I'll tell you when we get there, okay?"
I pulled his finger off. "But Josh..." I began, with a whiney voice I didn't expect to come out of me, "You said right after school. You're avoiding the subject. I mean once we go on walking I'll start thinking about other things and forget what you're supposed to tell me, I'm sure. I'm not that good at remembering, that's why I'm so nostalgic. I like to remember. I'm just bad at it."
He laughed at me. "Hayley it is..a bit hard to say. I don't know how you will take it." Josh looked at me with a scared expression.

"You know you can tell me anything, right? We're on the brink of being...best friends." I blushed. He chuckled. "Yeah, I know, and I can trust you. But it's super personal. I haven't even told my parents, or my brother."
"Woah, woah, woah," I said, stopping him, "You have a brother and you didn't tell me? I don't remember you telling me."
"Well so-rry." he replied obnoxiously. It was joking, though. "He's younger than me," he continued, "and he's awesome at drums. He's pretty cool. Maybe you can meet him. We don't interact much at school."
"You guys are brothers and you don't interact? Or even walk home together? What is wrong with you?" I said. Then I hit my head. "Oh my God he's at the same school and I don't even know him. This is just plain crazy."
"Again..sooooo-ry." His extended 'O's stretched out the word for a good four seconds.
"I don't understand this. Why didn't you tell me? It's like you don't tell me anything."
"Hayley we aren't dating. You don't need to know everything." Josh told me. That one hurt a bit, but I didn't show my feelings. I was hiding behind this mask. I looked up at him real quickly, but looked away. I couldn't tell him now. Maybe when he tells me this 'hard to tell' news of his then I might tell him I like him. Could I, though? How would he take news like that?

When we entered Starbucks, Josh breathed in deeply, smiling contently. "Don't you love the feeling you get when you walk into this place? It's just so coffee house."

"That's kind of because it is a coffee house." I told him, laughing a bit. Josh nodded and looked at me. "So do you want anything? I'll pay for it."

"I've got money," I countered.

"Come on, I'm trying to be a gentleman here, Hayley," he told me. I smiled back. "What happened to Hayles?"

"Oh I'm sorry, Hayles," he said, correcting himself and giving me a joking eye-roll.

"Just get me a blueberry muffin and vanilla bean frap. Never tried it but I want it," I said with a laugh.

"Okay, coming right up," he said with a waiter's voice.

Once Josh came back with the food, I took a quick sip and stared right into his eyes. "I'm serious this time, tell me. Don't think I've forgotten."

"I was hoping you did," Josh began, on-edge. He took a sip of his coffee and then gazed into my eyes. "But here goes..."

I listened intently.

"So I've been invited to more than one of Jaelyn's parties. Of course, I used to date the girl. But the party that changed my entire life was her summer party. It was blazing hot, but her house was air conditioned. Duh, she's rich. Anyhow, everyone wanted to hang out there, it was the hot-spot of the summer. Or, cool-spot, since it was air conditioned...er, irrelevant. Anyways, so she called me, inviting me over. The party started around ten o' clock, like her usual parties do, super late..."

I interrupted. "So I'm going to have to go around ten? Crap! My parents would never let me. Unless I..."

"Can I continue? I could gladly stop and listen to you. I don't like this story," Josh asked, with a partly irritated, partly happy expression.

"No, continue," I apologized, staring into his eyes again.

"Okay, so moving on, Jaelyn's party was around ten, and yeah, I was stoked. She was seriously the best looking girl on campus and I didn't see past her... evil ways. She was just so...hot. I felt lucky enough I was dating the girl. Then again, I was a young, horny teenager," he chuckled and then continued. "Man, was I wrong about her. She just used me and made me do something I seriously regretted."

"And what was that?" I asked.

"Well, around eleven thirty or so I was totally wiped out. I mean I took a couple drinks and a few shots, not sober anymore. It amazes me I remember this experience. Jaelyn grabbed me by the collar of my shirt and began to make out with me next to the bar."

"She has a bar at her house?" I asked again.

"Yeah, she does. I mean her parties are wild, Hayley. So anyways, the next thing I knew we were sneaking into her bedroom and she was pulling out a box of condoms."

I gasped. This story was starting to cause some impact. My chest ached slightly.

Josh paused and look down at his drink, shaking his head. "She told me to use them and next thing I knew we were in bed and she...well, you know. Any other guy would probably like it, I mean Jaelyn's a nice catch, but I didn't. I hated what she made me do. She's a bit of a phsyco. At least now you know why I avoid her."

"But what about the campfire? You invited her."

"Only because I thought you two were friends," Josh replied.

"We are so not friends and I think you would have figured that out. And why think about me, anyways? About what I want?" I asked him softly. The story was still processing through my brain, it was hard to comprehend due to the pain I felt.

"Well...Jaelyn invited herself in a way. Like I explained before. I honestly would settle for her friends, without her, but wherever her friends go she goes. Oh, trust me Hayley her friends are a lot nicer than her overall."

"Alright then. I understand this is hard for you. I get why. We might as well not go to that party, right?" I meant it this time. Who knows what she wanted to do to Josh there. Hell, Jaelyn could just be using me

"Hang on..." Josh began, his expression different, like he just had an epiphany, "what if I could get some sort of revenge on her? We'd have some of my friends pitch in on it. You could even meet my brother."

"Oh finally!" I said sarcastically. "Because you never told me about him."

"No, but seriously Hayley. I want my revenge against that girl. Haven't you heard that revenge feels sweet?"

"I hate her too. And though my goodie-two-shoes insticts are coming in, I still feel like after what she did...she deserves her punishment. Okay. Let's do it."

"But we need a plan first. Hey, after school tomorrow want to come over? My parent's aren't home until six-ish. You could hang out at my place for a while," he offered.

"Uh...yeah. Done deal." The only thing wrong with that plan is I don't know what my parents will say after I ask permission to hang out over at a guy's house. Oh dear Lord help me.

My Heart CH.9

My Heart: A Joshayley Story CHAPTER9

Hayley and Josh stared blankly towards Jaelyn. She smiled quickly as she looked at who just came in. Josh hastily walked towards the secretary before Jaelyn could open her mouth.

"I have doctor's notes!" He said, out of breath.

Jaelyn eyed him, completely on-edge. "What?!" she almost screamed. "Hayley and I had the same doctor's appointment. You see...our...our parents are..." he panicked.

"Our parents are friends!" Hayley said, chiming in. "Yeah. We are totally friends. I mean Mr. Farro said...they have...um..."

"A really great doctor," Josh said, completing that sentence.

"Yeah! I mean...the doctor was really, really good. They reccomended him for me, and we ended up in the same office." Hayley agreed. She exhaled a quick breath, glad that was over with.

Jaelyn' face was a fiery red.

"So you're just going to believe them?" she asked the secretary in annoyance. "I mean...seriously...uh..." she was at loss for words. For once she had no idea what to say. "Never mind." She walked out towards the door, her head still up after that blow.

During lunch, Josh and Hayley sat together with his friends. Luke was there, and so were a few people she knew from Ms. Stoke's English/History class. She found that she had a lot in common with this shy girl named Kelly. She was really quiet and into reading. During lunch she had a novel in her hand as she drank out from a smoothie, multi-tasking. It was like she didn't care about anything else around her, she was so engrossed in her novel and nothing else mattered. Kelly had long, brown hair that hung straight and wore no make up. Very different from the rich kids around here, very simple, which Hayley admired about her.

"So what did you think of that whole caveman thing during History? Messed up, right?" Josh asked.

"Yeah. I felt like...a caveman, of course," Hayley replied with a hearty smile. They laughed along. "Well I had to endure this long, boring lecture in math. And it wasn't even about math, it was more about how math is all around us. Like we've never heard about that before," Luke added, a groan in his voice.
"Yeah, same here! I have Mr. Carter third period. He's a crazy nerd," Hayley replied. "Almost everyone thinks he's boring," Luke agreed.

Hayley laughed. "Yeah he's a freak...no offense."

"You are such a goodie two shoes. No offense?" Josh asked.

"What? I don't like talking crap about teachers, no matter how horrible they are, and if I insult, I say no offense...even though sometimes it doesn't make it less offensive." Hayley countered, defending herself. "God, I really need a soda. I'll be right back."

She walked over towards the lunch counter, grabbing a soda right when Jaelyn approached her, seeming uncomfortable and tense. Their eyes met; Hayley's narrowed. "I think we got off on the wrong foot...more than once," Jaelyn said with a smile plastered on her face. "Why not...you know, be friends?"

"You...you want to be friends with me?" Hayley asked skeptically, paying for her drink. "Jaelyn, we don't have much in common."

"That's never stopped anyone from being friends before. We probably have tons in common but we don't know about it. Tell you what, why don't you come to a party I'm throwing this Saturday? I throw parties all the time. Josh and all his friends are invited too, if they want to come." Jaelyn nodded over at Hayley's table to add emphasize to her statement. "Come on, it will be so much fun. All my parties rock, I promise. You can even tell me what music you want me to play. Maybe we can find what we have in common by doing that. We might be into the same music. Come on Hayley. Have some fun."

She smiled, her large eyes glowing. During that moment she seemed genuinely excited and willing to become friends with Hayley, which surprised Hayley a little. Never had she expected Jaelyn would invite her to anything.

"Well..." Hayley began, "I don't know. I'll have to ask Josh first."

"Of course. Why, are you guys...dating?" There was a hint of jealousy in her tone, her voice suddenly going high as she said the last word.

"No. It's not official, and we're just...pretty good friends now. I just don't want to show up alone."

"Oh okay, well that's cool. Let me know, okay? It's only Monday. You've got the whole week to decide. See you around, mmkay?" Jaelyn told her her voice so nice and sweet that it was hard to believe this was the Jaelyn Hayley knew. "Sure, sure." Hayley replied, a bit creeped out at Jaelyn's attitude, pondering why she was being so sweet.

She took her seat by Josh again when she got back. "Jaelyn's invited us to this party. Saturday. Wanna go?" Hayley asked, her puppy dog eyes applied to her face, trying her best.

Josh looked at her as if she was crazy. His face crumpled up as he thought about Jaelyn. "Jaelyn's parties...they aren't something you'd want to get involved with. She's going to get you to do something horrible during parties, Hayley. I know how that feels like."

"Why? What happened? I know you guys used to date..." before she went on, Josh stopped her. "Forget it. We don't need to go."

"Josh, she's being super nice to me in a super creepy way and I don't know...she's giving me this whole let's be friends and find out more about each other act. I want to see if she means it. If it's true."

Josh laughed at her words, acting like what she said was incoherent and completely absurd. "Seriously, Hayley. Jaelyn? Come on, you can't be stupid enough to believe that whole act. She's so good at what she does. She should be a damn good actress, really." He chuckled again, already seeing the idea of Jaelyn as an actress in his head.

"But let's say, for argument's sake, that I am stupid. Why not, Josh? She's really...being different. Maybe she does want to be friends with me. Please. Come on, she said your friends are invited too. We could all show up, you know, as a group and mingle and do all that stuff they do at parties."

"Hayley, I don't know if you are doing this to be noticed or to really be friends with Jaelyn. Do you want to be like her? She will corrupt you."

"And how do you know that?" Hayley argued, her eyebrows pulling together.

An angry scowl flickered on Josh's face, and he took a breath to compose himself. "Because I know how it feels to be with her. I've dated her, Hayley. And I never want to go back down that path again."

"Well if you'll be more specific and tell me what the hell happened with you two maybe I'd agree and get your point. Josh, you need to let me know. I thought we were friends."

"Hayley...we are."

"Then why won't you tell me?" Just then the bell rang.

Josh exhaled. "I'll tell you after school, okay? Just don't know how you'll take it."

"You can tell me anything." Hayley assured him with a smile, giving his hand a reassuring squeeze. The two got up and Josh nodded. They walked to sixth period together.

My Heart CH.8

My Heart: A Joshayley Story CHAPTER 8

NOTE: Hanna Beth is who I imagined Jaelyn to look like, haha. ----------->>

HAYLEY'S POV:
I took a deep breath and stared right into his scared face, boring my eyes into his. He was expecting me to yell, of course, I could tell by the nervous way he curled and uncurled his fingers and trembled slightly. Instead, I smiled.

"Josh..." I began, "I'm glad you told me the truth, but you don't have to go on lying to me just to...you know, hang out and all that. You could have just asked."

His shoulders dropped, relaxing a bit. "I know, but come on, that's what every other guy would do. It's so damn typical."

"Yeah, and it's so damn easy and normal," I told him, laughing. "And anyways, I would have liked the easy approach better." I looked around the parking lot and realized our potential ditch plan was now over. "So..now what?"

"I don't know. Go back to school? Fake a parent's note? Something to get us off the hook," he suggested. "I'm sure everyone is looking for us in the classrooms now, and we have no excuse."
"I like the parent note idea. That's probably the easiest way to go. Hopefully the secretaries are stupid enough to believe us."

"Yeah. Hopefully," he replied.

JOSH'S POV:
Thank God. For a second there I thought I would be dead meat. Hayley could have screamed at me, and it would have scared me to death. I wouldn't want to mess with her, I knew deep down that this girl was tough. And I didn't want to lose her, either, she was so different from everyone here. I liked her.

"We need to get some paper," I told her, as we both walked back towards the school.

"Duh," she answered. "How are we going to make a note without it?"

"Right. We can go down to Henry's General Store. Henry has...everything."

"You sound like a commercial ad," Hayley noted, amusement in her voice.

"Thanks," I said sarcastically. "Now I feel much better."

She laughed at me again. "Hey, we gotta act fast because third period begins..." I looked quickly at my watch and back at her, "in thirty minutes."

JAELYN'S POV:
And so Hayley and Josh think they could get away quickly. Without anyone seeing.

Yeah. Right.

I'm no stalker, but seriously, sneaking away from the school parking lot is the stupidest thing they have done yet. Honestly, why the parking lot? It's so exposed. So obvious. Of course I noticed them run off.

But whatever. They are so dead. By the end of second period I swear I will personally go to the office to tell them about their little rendezvous. But anyways, detention together would probably be the downside of this plan. They would spend it together, and mingle and maybe come out as boyfriend and girlfriend. Oh God. I could puke at the notion.

In twenty minutes I would go to the office and tell them it was all Hayley's idea. That way, maybe Josh would be let off the hook and that stupid redhead would sulk in detention.

HAYLEY'S POV:
Henry's General Store was very...general. It was small, with a bunch of different aisles. It had an egg farm in the back, where cartons and cartons of eggs were kept in a refrigirated room, while chickens who laid the eggs were kept in their pens outside of the store. Candy bars adorned the front of the store, beside the cash register. Strange music played. I felt like I was in an old farmhouse, if it weren't for all the modernizations.

"Hey Henry," Josh said casually to the man at the front counter. "Do you have any formal doctor's note paper? I've got a little issue."

"Oh yeah?" Henry replied, with a heavy southern accent, "What is it this time?" Henry started pulling out a pad of yellow paper and a pen. He handed it to Josh.

"I don't want detention. My friend and I...well, we tried to ditch but..." he paused and shook his head. "It's a long story."

"Whatever you say, Josh," Henry said with a wink.

"Wh...Henry?! It's not like that. We're not..." he stopped and looked at me quickly, and then looked back at Henry. "Don't say anything," Josh told Henry sternly, his finger out pointing at him like a mother would point and scold her child.

Henry laughed, and his breath smelled like cigarettes. "Ok."

Josh finished writing us both notes. "Let's just say it was a coincidence that we both had a doctor's appointment...at the exact same day...and time." Josh shook his head, suddenly disappointed. "They will never believe us," he said with a sigh.

"Josh," I said, grabbing his hand...which was strange because I was suddenly used to doing that now, "you're giving up too fast. Let's just see what we can do." He smiled at me, hope infused into it. God, I loved that smile. This whole crush thing was getting way too complicated.

We walked back towards the school, and the we heard the faint bell ring. "Oh crap, come on!" Josh told me, picking up his speed. We ran, my hand in his, towards the office at the very front of the school. Finally, out of breath, we reached the office door. Josh pulled it open for me like a gentleman, but I didn't expect what I saw.

Jaelyn was there.

My Heart CH.7

My Heart: A Joshayley Story CHAPTER 7


HAYLEY'S POV:

What was I going to do?

I woke up around 3 AM, twisting and turning. I looked up at the ceiling. It was Monday. That whole thing would be the talk of the school. What would happen then? Would I just run and hide? No. That's a bad plan.

Then what?

I was too nervous to talk. It was like the first day of school all over again. Just when I thought I had made decent friends and fit in, that had to happen. Today all I knew is we had homework due and I didn't do it. But ignoring that, my thoughts flew back to what had happened at the bonfire. He and I kissed...and everyone saw. Josh would probably ignore me. That was embarrassing and humiliating for him, and I know scared guys when I see them. Now I don't even know if we'll make it past first period.


I drifted back to sleep, but it was quick. The alarm clock rang again, and I bounced back up. I needed to wear something that would make me blend in and become a nobody again. I pulled out a dark, black hoodie and regular jeans. My shirt was a dark grey. Simple, easy and attention-proof. Hopefully.


Mom was downstairs and so was dad. He should have been out to work by now. Huh. "Morning, Hayles," dad called out. He was reading something, as usual. Mom was cooking waffles. "Breakfast will be ready soon."


"Take your time, mom." I said.


"Why? No rush for school today? Or that boy?"


"Boy? What boy?" Dad asked all of a sudden. I laughed nervously.


"Nothing, dad. It's just a joke." I glared at mom quickly and she realized what I meant. I sighed and sat down. Pulling out everything in my backpack, I searched through the items. Scraps of paper and pencils flew out. It was dusty in here. Finally I found the science homework that was due today. I read through the questions.


Read section 2.1 to answer questions 1-10. Then read section 2.2 to answer the questions 11-13. Draw a detailed, labeled drawing for question 14. No scribbles and be neat.

Just what I needed. Ugh. I pulled out a science textbook quickly from under the table. I flipped through it wildly. I finally sound section 2.1, but skipped a few questions. So far I'd answered questions 3, 4 and 6. I even managed to draw that whole detailed drawing quickly. I just hope it is good enough to pass. Mom said breakfast was ready, and I ate slowly. I managed to make a conversation between my parents and myself.

"What's with the mess of your backpack, Hayley?" dad asked. "N-nothing. It's just I'm trying to clean it out, so I threw all the papers out." I swallowed another bite of the waffle. This was really good, so I ate even slower. "Better not be late for school, Hayley. It's already past the time you'd usually leave."

"It's fine. I don't care," I said, and I did mean that, but I knew my parents wouldn't be very happy. I paused and re-worded my sentence. "I mean...I do care but my teacher doesn't come in until five minutes later, so it's not like there's any worry," I lied. Of course, the true reason I wanted to slow down was Josh.

"Oh, alright then," mom replied. When I looked up at the clock, I realized how late it really was. I got up from the dinner table and began to hurry.

Quickly, I packed up my backpack and took the science homework. I'd just get someone to copy off of. "See ya, mom," I said quickly. I started walking towards the school. It was about ten minutes away by foot. I had to run now, since I was really running late, and I was sweating when I finally got there. The hallways were empty and nobody was around. I was definitely late. Ms. Wells was already inside the classroom once I entered, and I just realized my hair looked like a haystack. "Hey..." I said coolly. I tried not to look at Josh. His eyes darted straight at me, though, so that made the task quite hard. "Sorry I'm late." People laughed quietly. "Just take your seat, Hayley," Ms. Wells said sternly. She wasn't happy with me.

JOSH'S POV:

Well now what? She is right there, looking terrible and sweaty. And I'm sitting here like a fool. I should probably talk to her by the end of class. I don't want her to think anything is weird between us. But Jaelyn told me that she didn't sit with me in the car because she was afraid of me. She told me Hayley might hate me now, because that's how girls are.

Wait a second.

Trust Jaelyn? Highly unlikely. Why would I trust her? But it seems like all those facts she threw out at me in the van made sense. Hayley was avoiding me because it was a sudden move. I was pushed, though! Why would she think I did that on purpose? And Jaelyn mentioned something about never being friends again, and to stay away from her? Why should I? We needed to talk this out. Though I could avoid her...

No. We need to talk.

I'm not letting this go easy. But what do I say?

"Mr. Farro?" Ms. Wells called.

I didn't even realize she called me. "Yeah?" I replied lamely. I was spaced out. What was Hayley thinking? Hayley, Hayley, Hayley. She filled my thoughts, I had no time for the current science lesson on the board.

"What happens to the cell?"
I looked up toward all the writing. It was something about cells, but I didn't recognize it. Something we probably were talking about while I talked to myself, no doubt. "I...I don't know." I muttered. Ms. Wells narrowed her eyes toward me, brows furrowed. "Well pay attention, Mr. Farro!"

I didn't have time to 'pay attention'. I had to talk to Hayley.

HAYLEY'S POV:

The bell rang. I packed my stuff quickly, hoping Josh wouldn't be able to catch up if I left early. Josh called for me as we all exited the classroom, but I ignored, carrying my feet forward. I desperately wanted to talk to him though, despite the fears I had that he'd be mad at me...or something. He suddenly grabbed my arm, pulling me backward. "Hayley," he began, his breaths coming out as pants. "I'm sorry."

"For what?" I asked him, confused. Wasn't I supposed to apologize? Or maybe it was just both our faults? His eyes stared down on me, but I couldn't meet them.

"You know." he told me, inhaling. I heard people whistling at us like we were a couple. Obviously, news of that kiss spread.

"Could you guys just shut up?" Josh asked them, not meaning to be rude, I hoped. He rolled his eyes and looked back at me again.

"Sorry Hayley. I didn't mean to...um...run from you." he said apologetically. His expression was unreadable, I didn't know which emotion is face conveyed.

I sighed. "Yeah. I know. I'm sorry for not talking to you about it..." He stopped me suddenly. "Well we're cool right?"

I held his forearm lightly. "Okay," I sighed, "Yeah. No more funny stuff."

"None," he agreed. I smiled.

"You know what?" he asked, "Why not ditch school? It's healthy once in a while. I don't care what happens. What do you say?"

I wanted to, badly, but mom and dad would probably freak. And this was a very rich, high-expectations type of school. "What do they do to rule violators?" I asked, curious.

"Detention, at worst. Getting suspended is for serious stuff. I mean come on, people do this all the time." Once he revealed that fact, my fear about punishments eased, but I was still skeptical. Ditching seemed like something suspension-worthy. But I'd blame him if we got in trouble.

JOSH POV:

Okay, so I lied. I just needed to spend time with her. She didn't forgive me fully yet, well--it seemed that way, and I wanted her to. Losing a friend like her would make school so much more boring. We walked out the doors during the rush of everyone around us. We passed by the gym quickly, running. Nobody would notice. Out the black gates of the school we went, and into the school parking lot. She was nervous, I could tell. First time ditchers usually are. Wait--was she one?

"Hey, is this the first time you ditched school?" I asked her. I wished that I could I just see through her mind. Life would be easier if it was like that. "N-" she paused briefly and then sheepishly smiled back at me. "Yeah. I'm kinda freaked about it. But pretty stoked, too."

"Don't worry," I assured her, grabbing her hand, "it's fun. Remember..." my voice cracked. We would probably get suspended for this. Especially ditching from first period. Lying to her could make her even more mad. Maybe she'd never forgive me again. She said her parents would freak. I know mine would. We had to turn back. I couldn't risk her getting mad again. I sighed, stopping in the middle of the parking lot and turning towards her. "Hayley, we won't just get detention at worst."

"Wh-what?" she asked me.

"I...lied. We are going get suspended. Or worse. Expelled. I'm sorry I'm being such a jerk. I just wanted to be with you, I wanted to restore our friendship, for whatever it was worth."

"So, you lied....just...just to hang out with me?" She didn't sound forgiving.

"Well...kind of," I mumbled, guilty. Why did I have to tell her. Anyways, honesty is the best policy. Might as well take on whatever reaction she had. Maybe she'd admire my honesty.

Oh God. I took a deep breath, skeptical.

Get ready for the yelling.

My Heart CH.6

My Heart:
Joshayley
CHAPTER 6

The sun came down and night fell quickly upon all the teenagers. It was exactly 7:30 PM, and the skies were already dark.

Jaelyn grinned a wide grin. "I have an idea," she said aloud, "anyone up for truth or dare?" Hayley grew nervous.

"Oh great," Luke whispered, "Jaelyn's truth or dare crap is a major, major embarrassment." He rolled his eyes.

"I've got a bottle. Just make things fair and let's spin it to see who goes first!" Jaelyn announced. Alexa and Madison squealed like little girls. "I hate these games," Josh whispered into Hayley's ear. "I completely hate it."

Jaelyn walked over toward the middle of the circle of teenagers and placed the bottle there. She quickly spun it around and went back to her original spot. Please not me, please not me...Hayley said, but it was too late. The bottle had spun and immediately pointed at her. "So what is it, Hayley? Truth or dare?" Jaelyn asked, obviously enjoying the game. "This is a rhetorical question...right?" Hayley mumbled. Jaelyn falsely laughed. "Come on! It's just some teenage fun. Truth or dare?"

Hayley gulped.

"Truth."

Jaelyn grinned. "Okay then," she said, whispering amongst her friends. They laughed and giggled quietly, and then Jaelyn faced Hayley. "Do you like Josh Farro?"

Hayley's face turned a bright red. "What?" She asked in surprise.
"She's deaf!" Alexa whispered, though she clearly wanted the rest of the group to hear. Others laughed. Jaelyn had a wide, proud, and somewhat evil smile plastered across her face. "You guys have really gotten to know each other well, right?" Jaelyn continued in an all-too bitchy manner.

Hayley only nodded.

"Then tell us!" Jaelyn half-yelled, urging Hayley. The others agreed, nodding and awaiting her reply. She took a breath.

"What the hell is your problem, Jaelyn?" Josh said to her face. Hayley's head immediately turned towards him. "Some people really don't need to reveal this personal stuff. Your questions are messed up."

Jaelyn glared back at him. "It's just a game." she said. "Just a game? You humiliate these people and all the questions aimed at you are always the good and safe ones. We should just stop playing altogether."

HAYLEY'S POV:
My hero. Well, for getting Jaelyn off my back anyways. She just stared at him wide eyed, probably because nobody has ever messed with her before. I smiled at him and my eyes darted towards her again, dumbfounded. Everyone around us was silent. "I just...I just don't like these games..." My eyes nervously flickered between Josh and Luke, but I could still feel Jaelyn's burning gaze. Josh glanced down towards me, a half-smile pasted on his lips. And in that quick second I found my confidence.
"Oh, and I actually do like Josh," I stated proudly, "but as a friend."

Jaelyn glared at me, her eyes burning into mine. I tried to ignore the intensity of the gaze and looked towards Josh. She moved on with the game, spinning the bottle again. This time, thank goodness, it didn't land towards me.

Luke had a wide grin on his face.

"What is it now?" I asked in aggravation.

"Hey! I'm not making fun. You took that pretty well. If it wasn't for Josh I bet you couldn't even have replied to her. But anyways, good job," the last part was a bit sarcastic.

Soon, the others found different pleasure games, and Josh brought out his guitar from somewhere behind him. I never noticed it before. "Anyone want to play classic campfire songs?" he suggested. Jaelyn and her friends rolled their eyes and glared at me, most likely still annoyed with that not-so-long-ago truth or dare incident.

"Why don't we play Spongebob's campfire song?" I shot out. Josh laughed, and so did the others. Well, except for the three other girls of course, but I didn't need them to laugh. "You do have Spongebob teeth, Hayley," Josh told me, chuckling. They laughed again, but I couldn't deny this fact. I did have gapped teeth. "Spongebob!" Luke yelled out. Everyone laughed. So did I. "Haha. Okay you guys," I said, strangely more comfortable, feeling totally welcome in this group now, "can we just get to the song now? Do you know how to play it, Josh?"

"I can try." he told me. He began with one chord, and strummed a simple tune. There was some type of new confidence in me, so I figured I might as well use it before it disappeared. I started the first verse.

"Let's gather 'round the campfire..and sing the campfire song...the..." soon enough, more people joined in. "THE C-A-M-P-F-I-R-E S-O-N-G song!" They yelled. I laughed and people brought out stuff for smores as the song continued on. It was like camping. But somewhat better.

When people began packing the stuff back in the car, I stood by Josh while helping him load the back of the van. Someone was moving so quickly and pushed me towards Josh, and something or someone else pushed him towards me, and my lips suddenly planted against his. Our lips were forced together, and suddenly almost everything was still. I think the time slowed down. It was only a few seconds, I'm sure, but it felt like an eternity until I snapped back into reality. Once I heard some laughter from the others, I knew it was over. He pulled away and disappeared, and I looked like an idiot all alone back there.

JAELYN'S POV:
Oh wow. That...that annoying little twit just had to fucking steal Josh away. I don't know how I would deal with her, but there's an old trick in the book that works everytime. As usual, I'd be nice to her (as I did with other girls who liked Josh) and then use her to the point where Josh refuses to like her anymore. Blackmailing, kind of. This plan works everytime, and I've seen Josh kiss too many girls now. What I don't understand is why so soon? They've only known each other for a little while. What does she have that I don't?

I went up to her. She looked so stupid because Josh had walked away so quickly. I know that she was surprised, based on the look on her stupid little face. "Hayley, are you okay?" I asked her. She stared back at me with an irritated look. "What do you want?" she darted back at me. "Just trying to help," I replied sweetly, so fake, yet so easily considered genuine. "Looks like he didn't like it."

"Like what?" she asked, a thick edge of irritation in her voice.

"The kiss. That was rushed, don't you think?"

"Or maybe I was just pushed," she stated, "why do you care anyways?"

"I don't. Trust me, I really don't. But I just don't want you to feel...awkward. Why not ride in the other car with Luke and all the kids you became friends with? I'll try to convince Josh that was all an accident."

"I don't..." she protested. I cut her off, of course.

"Do you think he really wants to see you after that whole confusion? I mean he ran away like a scared boy. I knew him longer than you did, and trust me, he gets freaked by these things." I had to lie. I'm pretty sure Josh liked this girl, but I couldn't take any chances of them being together. I seriously just want Josh back and I won't let this little girl stand in my way.

"I guess it's better. But, just this once, will I listen to you," she told me warily, walking away. I rolled my eyes. She thinks she's smarter, but I have this all planned out. It will hurt me a little bit, but it will hurt Josh in the end and he will hopefully come running back to me.

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My Heart CH.5

*note: there was currently a poll I posted that asked where they should go for the outing, with various choices, and fair/carnival was the clear winner. so hayley, josh and her friends spent the day at a fair/carnival in tennessee. read on, and thanks for voting!

My Heart: Joshayley: Chapter 5

Each house they passed made Hayley more comfortable sitting beside Josh at the front of the car. Everyone asked her who she was, and she even created new friends during the car ride.

HAYLEY'S POV:
Stay steady, Hayley.
I was shaking. When Jaelyn, Madison and Alexa (all coming out of the same house...er, are these three sisters or something?!) stepped into the car, I rolled my eyes quickly, and stared out the window. They didn't glare or look at me, but started talking to Josh flirtatiously. I never came up in the conversation. They took up the back seat, and apparently another car was tailing us in the back. It was, obviously, other classmates. I hoped they wouldn't look at me like others in the school did.

We had breakfast at a diner someone from the backseat recommended us to go to. It was pretty crowded in there, but the welcoming smell of hot pancakes would bring anyone in. There was about 10 of us, and after a 20 minute wait for tables to get ready, we finally took our seats. I'm guessing other customers thought we were some rambunctious teenagers (everyone was giving us strange looks), and that the diner lady would probably feel over-worked after serving us, but hey, I couldn't blame them. We probably did look like rambunctious teens, but, as I observed, these teenagers really weren't. The people at the table (except Jaelyn, Madison and Alexa) tried to start a conversation with me by asking questions.

I didn't think they'd be the least bit interested, especially since I've already been at the school for over a week, but the talking made me feel comfortable to be here. Of course the three mean looking girls didn't make me feel comfortable at all, but as long as they were three chairs away from me, that was fine. Breakfast was soon finished.

This outing was far from over, though. It was just noon when they finished breakfast. Once everyone was out the door of that diner, Jaelyn spoke.

"There's a carnival down in Nashville today. We could all take a drive and hang out there. I hear they have the best carnival food around, even though it's a pretty...ehem, guilty pleasure for most of us," she eyed her friends, and they smiled back, unsure if that comment was good or bad. I was unsure if that comment was even supposed to be funny or what. "So who's up for it?"
"It's still way too early for a bonfire anyways," Josh said, and I immediately figured that he was planning a bonfire, "Why don't we go?"

Everyone else seemed to agree. Josh smiled at me, and we all walked towards the cars again, taking a brief road trip to Nashville. Franklin was not far from Nashville at all, but we did get caught up in traffic. I'm guessing lots of people loved this fair. The entire time in traffic was spent listening to rock music or talking about who did what back at school. More people asked me about my life, and I couldn't over-expose my entire personal life, so I stuck with the basics: how it was before I moved, how my friends were, and stuff that wasn't too revealing.

Jaelyn asked me more questions that made me a bit nervous to answer. I knew she was trying to squeeze information out of me, maybe to pass around the school, but I wouldn't let her whore me around like that. So I answered the easiest way possible, trying to make it short and simple enough to be counted for as an "answer". Once we actually got to Nashville, I already caught sight of a large ferris wheel spinning around, it's neon lights blinking. "Oh my God, I am so stoked!" Jaelyn declared aloud. I was pretty stoked myself. This place looked fun.

I caught sight of a kid's coaster, a fast, spinning ride, and a carousel. Kids screamed all around me, restless. I could hear shouting and laughter, and this gave me that feeling you get once entering a carnival. "We totally have to get inside the haunted house here. It's like a mystery house, but it's pretty scary," some brunette girl said. She and some other guys walked another direction, probably off to the "haunted house". "Want to ride ferris wheel?" Josh suggested. I would go on any ride with this guy, so of course I nodded and gave him an eager smile. "Sure." I agreed. We walked off, and it didn't take me too long to notice it was only me and him right then and there.

We stood in line for a while. Josh looked at me. I was silent, and getting uncomfortable of how silent I was. God, this nervousness had to just get out. When would I be loud, crazy Hayley again? Or was Josh just making me incredibly self-conscious and shy? I really did like him, could that be the reason?

Once we got on, I exhaled sharply, loudly. "I need to talk." I said sarcastically. "I've been so quiet I'm scaring myself."
Josh laughed. "Right. You kind of worried me too. I thought you were having a problem or something," he told me. We sat on opposite sides of the blue colored seat.
These ferris wheel carts didn't have a rooftop, so the wind wildly blew my hair in all directions. "So how do you like school so far?" Josh asked casually.
"Er..." I paused, making an unsure face. I couldn't completely rant about the displeasure this school brought me, but it wasn't all that bad, wasn't it? "I don't know. Everyone seems pretty nice so far...except..." I didn't continue, but he knew exactly who I was talking about.
"Jaelyn and her friends?" he asked worriedly.
I only nodded, blushing. I felt my face heat up. "I know. They invited themselves here. Jaelyn and I..." he paused. "You guys... what?" I prompted. "I used to actually go out with her," he said quickly. He stayed quiet after that statement. I had to speak up, before this ride was over. "Josh, it's nothing to be ashamed of. You saw something in her, and then you..broke up. You did break up, right?"

He chuckled. "Yes."

"Well okay then," I continued, "Just let it go and move on. There's always another day to look forward to." We went on with the casual conversation, sharing the ocassional joke now and then. The ride then slowed. I hadn't noticed how quickly time passed when I was with Josh. One by one, we all got out. We walked side by side. He looked at a ring-toss game. He stared at it, actually. "What?" I asked him, noticing. "You want to play?" He smiled at my suggestion.
"It's just...I'm really good at it," he admitted, smiling then.
I returned his smile. "Then come on! Let's go."

We rushed towards it like little kids, and before I knew it we were tossing them at the empty, glass soda bottles. Over a span of time, we actually managed to throw in 10 rings that made it, out of the bucket of 25, onto the soda bottles. Pretty suckish, but as I observed, nobody really even made it in, so 10 out of 25 was pretty good. I won a large, purple teddy bear. Well, technically Josh won it (he tossed most of the rings on there), but he handed it to me. That was enough to make my day.

The entire group of friends had headed over to a bumper car station later on in the day, after lunch was eaten. Fear struck me as we stood in line for that game--I wasn't that great a driver. It would have been embarrassing to get stuck in a corner and sulk in silence as everyone laughed--I could picture it now. I sighed, pulling myself out of the fantasy, knowing too well I wasn't going to end up like that.
Hopefully.
I turned to Josh, standing behind me. "Would you mind if I sat with you in your bumper car?"
He smiled, a smile that silenced my nerves, and nodded simply to my request.

Josh was a very skilled driver. Jaelyn had done a good job bumping her car into ours every single second, however, and a sick enjoyment on her face showed how much she liked it. It was quite annoying, my body shuddering with each impact. Thank God the bumper cars had soft bumpers around them or I would have been seriously injured by the end of that ride.

We drove up a pretty steep hill during the late afternoon, when the day was slowly ending, but Josh said he did this before, and based on his driving skills, I believed him. He drove up the trail so flawlessly, and if I had to drive up something like this, I would probably need a bag to breathe through. I wasn't that great a driver. I don't even know how I managed to pass at my driver's test, but I roam around with a license I don't really need. Just as we reached the top, both cars stopped and ahead of us was a grassy hilltop, only a few trees around us, but all you could really see was the green grass. It seemed like someplace perfect for a picnic. All this was so new to me. I never had gone up hills like this, (well, camp could be an exception) and I never had actually hung out on top of a hill with a bunch of people. Any normal person would probably go down to Nashville and shop, not make a tedious trip up here. This was also my first time being at a bonfire.

The people unloaded firewood, snacks and large blankets. I walked towards the back of the van, where there were tons of things left to hold. Josh handed me two blankets, and all ten of us walked towards the middle of the field, the breeze blowing all of our hairs in random directions, people tugging on their jackets and warming themselves. Once all the blankets were laid out, five people lit up the firewood and the bonfire was created. It was pretty spectacular up close, and so comfortably warm. The smell of burnt wood wasn't too bad, and some of the kids had burgers and hot dogs. A boy named Luke sat on one side, and Josh sat on the other side of me. "So how's your time at school so far?" Luke asked me randomly as he warmed himself by outstretching his hands toward the fire.

"Alright. I guess." I replied. "Why?"

"No reason." he looked away, seeming nervous. I tried to calm him down. "You seem pretty...reluctant to talk to me. Or...is something wrong," I paused and tried to think of something clever, "do I stink or something?"

Wow. NOT very clever.

"No! You don't," he replied quickly, "You seem cool, but intimidating. It's like the only one you want to talk to is Josh."
Once he heard his name, Josh briefly looked at us, but didn't say anything and looked away. I looked back at Luke. "Yeah...sorry if I seem that way. It's just really new here at this school. Kind of freaky how people are, too. Well...most people. Seriously, come on, you guys are in this huge rich kid school and I'm just ordinary. You guys probably have parties like this all the time, and I'm just not used to it."

Luke laughed.

"What?" I asked.

I think he took it as a joke or something. "It's nothing. Everyone thinks that about us when they come here, but we are pretty normal. Except for the really stuck up ones..." he glanced toward the trio of whores across us, all sitting pretty on the grass.
I laughed. "Oh God." I let out.
"Don't worry though, Hayley," he replied, "I'm normal. And so is a third of the population in the school. Okay...maybe less than that. But you'll find some decent friends here. Promise," he raised his left hand as if stating an oath to me.
I smiled. "Thanks."


Hope you ENJOYED this chapter!

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